Being a mommy is hard. I always knew I wanted to be a mom, and always knew it was God's bigger plan for my life. I just don't think I ever realized just how hard it could be. Don't get me wrong, it is by far the best job in the world and I wouldn't trade it for anything, but with that comes a lot of hard work. I had a rough day yesterday. Tucker has been doing really well (praise God), so sometimes it's easy to forget (just for a minute) that there is something going on that has not been figured out yet. There is still a big genetics test out and we are hoping it will provide some much needed answers. Until then, we wait. Back to yesterday, in a nut shell I had some difficulties with our home health company. Tucker still has his button in his belly even though he's not getting fed through it anymore. Mainly because we still don't know what's going on and also because he receives all of his meds through it to ensure he is getting all that he needs. So there is a special type of syringe that fits his belly. We recently ran out and needed more. I called our company but because he's not using their feeding supplies, they cannot provide syringes. The lady kind of acted like it was my problem, not theirs. It was infuriating. So here we are trying to figure out where to get them. Not a big deal, right? However, I think it brought back all the reasons he still has his button in the first place and another reminder that our journey is far from over. I felt defeated and cried for a while. But wouldn't you know God always has a plan. My bible study session yesterday was about parenting and really spoke to me. Here is a passage that I wanted to share to all of you moms out there who feel as if we have to carry the weight of our children and make sure everything works out for their best interest.
" the truth is that parenting is impossible-unless you fall flat on your face and surrender it all to the Father. Only in His wisdom, His strength, His energy, and His guidance can you attempt what He has called you to be as a mom."
Thank you Lord for revealing your truths to me! I cannot do it alone!
Although it's hard, it's the most rewarding job out there:)
Ok enough with my ranting, just really wanted to share my struggles and what helped me through:) on another note I have been so proud of Tripp. The other morning as I was fixing their breakfast, I overheard Tripp telling tucker to close his eyes and hold hands. I peeked over to see what he was doing, this is what I found.
He led his brother in prayer:) talk about a proud mommy moment. In that moment, I honestly felt like we were doing something right:)
We also had a play date with some good friends on Wednesday. When they sat down for lunch, Tripp wanted to pray with his friends. Another proud mommy moment. And thankful that the boys and I have good friends who love Jesus as much as we do:)
I am a perfectionist and micromanager. It is hard to let someone else take the reins, but I know that I cannot do this mommy thing alone. I have to let God take control:) thanks for stopping by, hope all have a blessed week! Here are a few recent pics:)
Love and blessings,
Traci
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